I just began...

a long-winded and pathetically whiny post about how bad this year has sucked and how tough I am for getting through not only this year but all the trials and tribulations of my life and so on and so on and blahblahblah.

I deleted it before I finished.

As many of you know, I haven't been writing because life has gotten in the way. As much as I KNEW that I have to keep taking care of myself (and writing, for me, is part of that)...I had to actually DO it or I'm no help to anyone.

For about a month or so now, I've been doing it. I've been logging my food religiously. I've been wearing my Bodybugg and making a point to move a little bit more every day. I've been making the doctor's appointments I need to make to get the random broken bits and pieces of me fixed so I can function without physical pain. I have NOT been obsessive. I have NOT made it an all or nothing situation.

I am changing my life, permanently, for the better, one step at a time and it is WORKING! The pounds that piled back on while I was drowning myself in my food addiction in response to uncontrollable (Hi. My name is Naomi and I AM a CONTROL FREAK!) situations in my life are starting to come off again. They aren't coming off at a record pace, but the scale is showing a lower number each week.

The world around me hasn't changed. Life is still incredibly stressful, but I am learning to respond to it in a healthier way. I am also learning to look past all the crap and appreciate the good. It's a challenging path, but I'm rising to meet it and my ass seems to be falling a little behind. ;)

One step forward...

and I don't know how many excruciatingly painful, very slow, limping steps back. Whatever I did to my knee in Utah has gone from bad to worse. I think that the steroid shot my G.P. gave me in it on Saturday morning must have helped with the pain just enough for me to move around way more than was smart. I tweaked it again today just by shifting my weight in my chair a bit and the ramifications almost brought me to tears. I have a fairly high pain tolerance, so I'm afraid this is going to be bad news. I'm going to the orthapeadic surgeon/sports medicine doctor early Wednesday morning. Keep your fingers crossed for me that he doesn't need to do surgery to fix whatever's broken. My healing rate from prior surgeries hasn't been so hot...they tell me it's going to be one night in the hospital and I end up having to stay for a couple of weeks. Rest...Ice...Compression...Elevation...(RICE)...and lots of Advil (although right now if someone offered me something stronger, I wouldn't say,"no.") Surgery is bad....physical therapy is good. Thankfully, I like to swim.