My two week pre-op diet...

starts on June 9th .  My surgery is going to be on June 23rd.

In the meantime, I've got quite a long "to do" list to get myself and my home prepared for this journey.

I've got to get back in the habit of logging my meals so I can make sure I'm getting enough protein and such.  I've done this on and off for ages, so it shouldn't be too hard to get back to it.

I also need to develop a habit of keeping track of how much water I drink.  I'm so used to being able to guzzle big 32 ounce cups of water.  After my surgery, I won't be able to do that so drinking enough water each day will take a little more effort.  I'm planning on buying one of those "flavor infusing" pitchers for the fridge.  I can add herbs and fruit and such to it, but mainly I'll know when it's empty that I've had at least as much water as my body needs.

I need to say "goodbye" to caffeine and carbonation.  I rarely have any, so this shouldn't be difficult....but I think one last Coke might be in order.

I need to start cutting out all the simple carbohydrates and increasing my protein intake.

I need to keep my ass moving.  I've been using my awesome new exercise bike a lot, but it's time to get back in the pool (it's finally warm enough - almost!) and WALKING.

I've got to start cleaning out the junk in the pantry and fridge.  I don't get into it much now, but I don't want to be tempted later.  My poor hubby is going to have to make some changes too!

I've got to go to the store and buy TONS of protein powder and low sodium broth.

Lots to do...little time to do it.

I've got to get BUSY!

I just began...

a long-winded and pathetically whiny post about how bad this year has sucked and how tough I am for getting through not only this year but all the trials and tribulations of my life and so on and so on and blahblahblah.

I deleted it before I finished.

As many of you know, I haven't been writing because life has gotten in the way. As much as I KNEW that I have to keep taking care of myself (and writing, for me, is part of that)...I had to actually DO it or I'm no help to anyone.

For about a month or so now, I've been doing it. I've been logging my food religiously. I've been wearing my Bodybugg and making a point to move a little bit more every day. I've been making the doctor's appointments I need to make to get the random broken bits and pieces of me fixed so I can function without physical pain. I have NOT been obsessive. I have NOT made it an all or nothing situation.

I am changing my life, permanently, for the better, one step at a time and it is WORKING! The pounds that piled back on while I was drowning myself in my food addiction in response to uncontrollable (Hi. My name is Naomi and I AM a CONTROL FREAK!) situations in my life are starting to come off again. They aren't coming off at a record pace, but the scale is showing a lower number each week.

The world around me hasn't changed. Life is still incredibly stressful, but I am learning to respond to it in a healthier way. I am also learning to look past all the crap and appreciate the good. It's a challenging path, but I'm rising to meet it and my ass seems to be falling a little behind. ;)

A little less than...

one down (0.8 to be precise)...many more to go. I didn't quite hit the two pounds my bugg and I were shooting for this week, but I'm going to call it a success regardless. I still lost and thankfully didn't GAIN!

Success points:

* I managed to keep track of what I was eating...EVERY SINGLE DAY!
* I managed to get to the gym (only once but I was doing PLANKS - real ones!)
* I did my physical therapy on the bike on 4 other days besides the gym day.
* I had LOTS of opportunities to make some really bad food choices and passed them up.
* I had calorie deficits on days when I thought I was going to have
surpluses...just because of extra activity.

For the sake of not psyching myself out, I'm not going to call them "failure" points:

* On one day, I ate and ate and ate...and didn't exercise...and ended up with a
calorie SURPLUS of over 1800 calories!
* I used food, once again, to comfort myself during a stressful situation. I could actually feel the anxiety melting away as I scarfed down my massive plate of Chili's french fries. Some people have their alcohol, or their drugs, or whatever. It seems I have food. There, I admitted it. Hi, my name is Naomi and I'm a food addict. (Y'all are supposed to say, "Hi Naomi!" and welcome me to the meeting or something now.)

I miss being able to get up in the morning and drive to the beach for a swim in the ocean. That was a better stress reliever than a plate of french fries. Much better.

What "they" say...

is true. You really do need to write down what you're eating. Well, maybe YOU don't...but I do. It's so damn easy to trick myself into thinking that I'm eating less. A little bite here...a little bite there...all those "little bites" add up to a couple of extra meals (maybe more) by the end of the week. When I don't write down what I'm eating, invariably, I don't lose weight...or worse, I gain!! I've been kidding myself for the past couple of weeks. I've done a great job "automating" my meals...especially breakfasts and lunches during the week. Weekday dinners and weekends still get away from me. This week, for example, I got up every morning and ate a hard-boiled egg and an orange for breakfast...for lunch, I had a big, green salad from the grocery store salad bar (lots of fresh, raw veggies, a couple of ounces of lean protein, and a tablespoon of dressing)...dinners, who knows? Does anyone know what I ate for dinner? I have no clue. It was different every day and I didn't write it down. See the problem?

So, I promise myself this: starting tomorrow morning, I will write down what I'm eating. Every bite of food that goes in my mouth will be documented. At the end of the day, I'll log it all into the Bodybugg system. It'll all be there...staring me in the face...inescapable...unavoidable. I won't be able to kid myself about the extra couple 100 calories of this or that...here and there. My ass won't be able to kid me about it any more either.

One step at a time.

Do you ever...

think something is ridiculously complicated? So much so that you're ready to throw it through a wall or flush it down a toilet in order to avoid trying to figure out how to use it? Well, that's how it is in life for me with nearly all things mechanical. The bigger the book of instructions, the more likely it is to bring me to tears and/or screams of rage.

So, you can imagine the fear that was brought about by my dear, sweet hubby buying me a BODYBUGG for my birthday. Remember my noble (but unsuccessful) attempts to set the loaner up while I was at fat camp?

The new BodyBugg is prettier than the loaner. Its monitor is shiny and silver and has a bright turquoise light. And it beeps when you push the buttons! I'm enamoured. I do love the idea of being able to use all of its exciting features.

But, once again, I open the box and find not one, BUT TWO giant instruction books...one for the Bugg and one for the display...and then, of course, there's a whole other set of instructions on the internet for setting up the online program.

Tears and screams of rage again?? Of course! For a little while, at least. But guess what?? I powered through it!! I didn't want to hurt my hubby's feelings. He always thinks long and hard about gifts for me. (I really am the luckiest wife in the world. I'll never begin to guess how he puts up with my crazy nonsense!) He would have been devastated if I'd given up and stuck the Bugg on a shelf in the closet or ran it over with my truck.

So...after many hours of frustration, I managed to set up my online account...and then, miraculously, it only took me a few minutes to figure out which end of the black cord/plug/thingy stuck into my laptop and which stuck into the Bugg. I was able to charge it successfully...and even more miraculously, I was able to get the information I'd typed into the computer to travel through the black cord/plug/thingy into the Bugg so it would know important things like how fat I am and how big my ass is and how much I'm trying to shrink it!

I was also able to figure out how to get the Bugg off of the black cord/plug/thingy and install it into its arm strap AND get the pretty silver monitor thingy installed into its watch band. Are you impressed yet?

I've been wearing it for nearly two weeks now. It's keeping track of all the calories I'm burning...hopping back and forth to the bathroom with my cool walker. I've even had my coaching session with the BodyBugg professional that taught me how to use all the online features. (You know if they would just have a real person come help you get set up from the get-go it would save people like me a lot of grief!)

For the past couple of days, I've been using the BodyBugg program to log my food instead of Fitday.com. It is easier to log food on the BodyBugg program...only because it seems to have more foods in the database. My understanding is that if you upgrade on Fitday.com and pay their membership fee (instead of being a cheapskate like yours truly and just using the freebie membership) you get a bigger database of foods. I just don't see any purpose in paying for both. I'm still staying on Fitday.com to use some of the other features though...especially the forums. The people on there are great and very supportive.

So, what's my point? Well, I'm proud of myself for gutting the BodyBugg setup out. Normally, I would have given up or smashed the damn thing with a hammer...but I didn't...and I've found it to be quite useful! Go me!

I just signed up...

on www.fitday.com. With my knee all boogered up (I'll find out on Monday whether or not I'm going to need surgery)...keeping track of what goes into my mouth is going to be paramount! I spent 30 minutes this afternoon wracking my brain, trying to remember if I'd eaten breakfast or not. Thirty minutes! (I know it was 30 minutes because there was a 30 minute t.v. show on in the background.) I finally gave up trying access that piece of information from the memory banks. I STILL don't know.

Based on that lack of knowledge...which is either caused by early onset senility or the VERY STRONG narcotic pain medication I'm taking for my knee, I decided that having a place to keep track of what I'm eating seemed like a good idea. I've learned the hard way that an Oreo here...a chicken wing there...a Frosty on the way home from work....a handful of whatever...all of those little bits and pieces of things that I can eat without really THINKING add up to a LOT of calories. This website is free...most of the others charge. Free is good. It has places to track food, activity (won't be using that very much for a while), moods, measurements, weight, goals, a journal, and message boards. I might be forgetting something, but you get the idea.

Hopefully, between that...and this...and the fact that my family is gung ho to help me right now, I'll be able to stay on track. I don't want to regain the weight I've lost and even if I can't get a lot of exercise for a while I really don't want to give up the fight in the epic war against my ass!