It has been determined...

INDUBITABLY determined, that I will NEVER be a runner.

Sometimes, the best thing a person can do to get where they're going is to admit they're lost and make a u-turn or stop and ask for directions.

I made it through the first week of the C25K program before my bad ankle crapped out on me. It was fun while it lasted. I've determined, however, that it's in my best interest to avoid the necessity of having the surgery my podiatrist recommended. Remember? I think I might have mentioned a while ago. It's the surgery where he replaces my "over-pulled taffy" ligaments in my ankle with ligaments that some dead person is no longer using. Gross. Gross. GROSS!!! Besides being a disgusting idea, the MINIMUM recovery time from this surgery is six weeks. That's six weeks being completely non-weight bearing...rolling around on one of those little carts. That's six weeks best case scenario. Considering that every time I've ever had surgery MY recovery time has been more like twelve times the best case scenario/average recovery time, all I can say to the whole notion is, "Thanks but no thanks!"

I prefer to reassess my goal. OK. I'm done. My goal of running a 5K is vapor. Gone. Poof!

Being able to WALK > Being able to run

In other news:

Tomorrow marks five weeks until I leave for my cruise. My weight loss has been pretty much stalled (not accounting for the 12 pounds I GAINED while I was completely out of commission with the vertigo) for a while now. I reintroduced a lot of bad eating habits while my fat ass and I were sitting around waiting for the world to stop spinning. When I was finally able to start working out again, I used all the exercise as an EXCUSE for eating extra crap. Great excuse, isn't it? "Sure, I can eat 2000 calories worth of pizza tonight. I burned off at least 300 calories on the treadmill this afternoon." Smart stuff.

So, like I said, I've got 5 weeks. I know how fast I can lose weight when I eat right. I've got my trainer's help. I've found lots of classes at the gym that I adore. I don't need to be able to RUN to get where I'm going. I do need to quit stopping to pick up junk food along the way! All those detours are making the trip take a lot longer.

The bad news is...

I got a call from the doctor's office yesterday. The results from my MRI came back. I'm even more broken than I was guessing. I have a stress fracture in my left tibia (shin) and a tear in my meniscus (the little cartilage doodad between the bones in my knee joint.) I think I spell meniscus a different way nearly every time I type it. If anyone knows the correct spelling and wants to clue me in, feel free!

I'll find out prognosis on Monday, but from what I was told over the phone it sounds like I have to wait for the fracture to heal and then I'll probably need surgery to fix the tear. Since the internet is such a great source of terrifying and depressing information, I was able to find out that it can take up to a year or longer for this sort of stress fracture to heal. Great. Crap. @#@!$#@!!! And THEN surgery!!!

The worse news is...this is all going on in my LEFT leg...otherwise known as my previously GOOD leg. What does that mean? Well...it means that I've been hobbling around with a brace on my left knee...putting most of my weight (which is still enormous!) on my BAD right knee...which is starting to hurt like a mother f'er. So...double crap!! I'm scared to even tell the doctor about it...but I guess I'm not going to have a choice. The way this is going, I'm going to end up in a Jazzy with a little flag before the end of the month.

On a lighter note...

The GOOD news is...The website that I found to log my meals and whatnot (www.fitday.com) has been nothing short of a diamond mine of information and tools. So, in spite of being temporarily disabled, I'm still losing weight. I'm down another two pounds since I got back from fat camp. The forums on Fit Day are fantastic and the people there have given me some great ideas about activities I can do without damaging my knee(s) any further.

All in all, I may be down, but I'm not out.

The battle goes on.

One step forward...

and I don't know how many excruciatingly painful, very slow, limping steps back. Whatever I did to my knee in Utah has gone from bad to worse. I think that the steroid shot my G.P. gave me in it on Saturday morning must have helped with the pain just enough for me to move around way more than was smart. I tweaked it again today just by shifting my weight in my chair a bit and the ramifications almost brought me to tears. I have a fairly high pain tolerance, so I'm afraid this is going to be bad news. I'm going to the orthapeadic surgeon/sports medicine doctor early Wednesday morning. Keep your fingers crossed for me that he doesn't need to do surgery to fix whatever's broken. My healing rate from prior surgeries hasn't been so hot...they tell me it's going to be one night in the hospital and I end up having to stay for a couple of weeks. Rest...Ice...Compression...Elevation...(RICE)...and lots of Advil (although right now if someone offered me something stronger, I wouldn't say,"no.") Surgery is bad....physical therapy is good. Thankfully, I like to swim.