One more...

weekend of hobbling around on crutches!! Maybe. I have an appointment with the orthopedic surgeon on Monday morning to find out if I'm allowed to walk like a normal person again. What I'm hoping NOT to hear is that I'm going to need knee surgery. That would suck. Yes, that would suck a lot.

I did some math this morning. Since I came home from fat camp, I've been losing an average of just over 3/4 of a pound per week. Not too shabby, eh? I know I'd be losing more if I was working out, but I'll take it...or leave it as the case may be.

I also know that I would be losing more if I were better at managing my stress levels. I'm slowly but surely trying to learn not to use food to self-medicate for stress. I've read all the suggestions: take a walk, take a bath, call a friend, read a book, etc. Sometimes, however, I just have such a crappy day that it seems like nothing but a plate of fried chicken with a side of macaroni and cheese chased with a giant bowl of ice cream will do the trick.

What gets me there more often than not? Probably having a teenager in the house...constantly stomping around and glaring at me because, of course, they know everything there is to know about everything and I'm a total and complete idiot. That'll screw with your cortisol levels!

Funniest thing about my stomping and storming teenager...little does he know that if he would only stop his tirades for a moment he'd find out that he's quite an inspiration to me. I've never met anyone with more willpower than him. Granted, he has some very interesting ideas about health and nutrition...but whatever he chooses to put into play, he does...completely and wholeheartedly. It's amazing. He's lost over 50 pounds since the beginning of the school year...eating primarily yogurt, lunch meat, and grilled chicken salads from McDonalds. If that's not will power, I don't know what is.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed and my prayers prayed that I'll get a clean bill of health on Monday. My stress levels are through the roof. I've actually started clenching my jaw so tight that it's starting to hurt. I'm not the only one, either; my husband was diagnosed with TMJ earlier today. So, what's my plan? Well, I'm going to keep doing what I've been doing...regardless the stomping. Hopefully, I'll get to start working out soon. I don't want to reduce stress with food...maybe a kickboxing class is in order. Somehow, punching things seems like a good idea.

I am so conflicted...

right now. My husband is sitting next to me...with not one but TWO..crispy..steaming-hot..slices of pepperoni french bread pizza on a paper plate. Part of me is so ready to throw something at him and steal the pizza...part of me is just wants to go in the other room and hide until he's done eating. The smell of it is killing me!

I can't tell if I'm hungry or not. I don't think I'm actually hungry. I might be thirsty but I don't feel like hobbling into the kitchen to get more water.

I talked to a chef yesterday that was talking about making "pizza" on slices of Naan with fat free this and organic that. Is he kidding? Pizza? Balderdash! That's not pizza! I'm not sure if what my husband's eating right now is pizza either (it is on a French bread crust)...but it SMELLS like pizza!

I'm thinking that while I'm trying to lose weight that maybe...just maybe...we shouldn't have some things in the house...no pizza...no Oreos...no chips...no chicken wings...no french fries. I mean I can pass up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, no problem...but passing up pizza? That's a problem.

I think I am hungry. I am NOT going to eat pizza though.